we're happy, free, confused and lonely at the same time. it's miserable and magical, oh yeah! i don't know bout you, but i'm feelin twenty two! cue 22 by taylor swift, y'all know i had to throw that in there hahahaha. anyways, yay! it's my birthday! but honestly...
i don't remember when was the last time i felt the joy and excitement of this very day. since the past few years, when this day comes i feel nothing special or ordinary about it. i stopped having birthday parties, surprises, extravagant gifts, even some people never gave me their wishes anymore. i used to wonder but i figured as i grew older, i will lose something along the way.
i have lose and yet i have gain the things i never imagined. i lost the people i loved, i lost my favorite jewelry and i lost a friend. there were also days where i lost hope in myself, which those days are now a blur in my memory, but i never forget the strength that i didn't know i have in me, as i was the one who pushed myself to get up and get out of those phases.
i went through horrible madness, yet i've gain courage, i heal, i love, i grow, and i learned. and that is more than enough that shaped the woman i am today. it took me a long time to make peace with my past, which i still am learning in the process of becoming a better version of myself. in more ways than one, i am proud of me.
today is gonna be a great day. i'm only 22 and i have so much life ahead of me, with one special person i wanna grow old with, and that's what i'm celebrating today. for now, i'm thankful for this season of my life and i'll have faith and be patient that everything will work out in my favor.
xoxo birthday girl, A.