for those who do not follow me on my social media and this blog, i am very much alive and well. for those wondering what this means, let me explain.
to be honest, i never really understood the theoretical meaning of fomo until i start my degree and learn about it in my communication theory class. have you ever heard the phrase "the grass is always greener on the other side"? it means that people often assume there are better things in other places. that's what will happen when you experience fomo, you will feel like you miss out on a lot of things.
i've been in the situation where i kept comparing my life and myself to other people's, keeping up with the latest trends, gossips and whatnot. i also felt anxious about not progressing or living a life that is not as exciting as it could be. seeing people's achievement makes me feel little, seeing girls my age getting married at an early age makes me jealous, seeing people living a luxurious life makes me ungrateful of mine. even worse, i constantly compare myself to pretty girls and models on social media, to the extent where i hurt myself to have a body like theirs. i have watched, with interest, of other people's life that they portray on social media, that i tend to forget it is manipulated, fake and sugarcoated.
but i realized that what i've done was wrong. i should've not compared of what i have to other people. everything that i've achieved, gotten, and had in my life has been such a blessing and worth to be grateful for. the more i kept comparing myself to other people, the more i ruined my own self esteem. so i decided to change the way i think by being grateful of every little things that i've had in my life. like my loving boyfriend, my supportive family, my healthy body, and myself.
then, i slowly start to remove and detach myself from things that didn't feel good for me and my mental health. i unfollowed and blocked a bunch of people whom i've outgrown and doesn't serve their purpose in my life anymore. i delete phone numbers of people that i don't wanna keep in touch with. i erase pictures that i wanna forget. i even went to as far as deleting my social media accounts and creating a new one, so that people whom i've removed can't reach me anymore. i like the thought of them wondering where i've been because i'm at the place where i'm unreachable to you except i reach out first.
so why would i feel fear of missing out?
invisibility is a superpower and ignorance is bliss.
xoxo, A.